Welcome, Participants

[mockmods]

Good morning, Participants. The time is now 7:30 AM.

[Where were you before this? Doesn’t matter, you’re here now, in an unfamiliar bed, surrounded by unfamiliar people, with a slightly-too-cheerful automated voiced chiming over a PA system to wake you up. Your pockets are empty, save for an unfamiliar smartphone type of device that comes alive under your touch, displaying, among other things, a map, a series of profiles, and a list of rules.]

It is understood that you may have questions; please be patient, and gather back in the Common Room in one hour. The Assistant will be present at this time to answer your questions. In the meantime, please feel free to explore the Facility at your leisure.

[The doors to the dorm areas are freely open from the inside, though you’ll find that it takes your electronic id to regain entry once you’ve left. Otherwise, it’s as the voice says, and you’ve got an hour to explore your new surroundings and get to know your fellow kidnappees.]

[Welcome to the Facility.]

Comments

[maxout]

[He actually looks a little intrigued at that, arms no longer crossed as he's instead paying some actual attention.]

Yeah?

So, how... how's that work? Like a transformation or do you just shove your, I dunno, essence or whatever into something physical?

[eudaimonikos]

The second one. They're created on a sort of random generator, and they don't behave entirely like real human bodies - I mean, I've had this for a couple thousand years, looks the same as it did back then.

On the other hand, I really do need these glasses. [He smiles a little, like it's a joke.] Very inconvenient.

[maxout]

D'you think...

[He pauses for a second, then tries that again while doing his best to keep the hopeful tone out of his voice.]

Would something like that work for anyone else, or... just you and uh... your... people? Oh, that feels offensive. Species... Whatever.

[eudaimonikos]

Hm.

[From the sharpness in Michael's gaze as he considers the question, he's probably picked up on the reason for asking anyway.]

Well, angels do the same thing, but they're actually quite similar to us in terms of make-up. But I don't see why not, in general. Aren't all human bodies just flesh shells piloted by souls and chemical reactions?

[maxout]

I mean, I wouldn't phrase it that creepily, but I guess you're not wrong.

[Still, though, he's not gonna think about that part too much.]

But it's possible. Doable.

...Maybe something good'll come out of this mess after all.

[eudaimonikos]

[Shrug! He probably could have phrased it creepier.]

Sure, I bet it can be done. Your only problem is you don't have a whole system backing you up. [.....] Wonder if I could sneak back into the afterlife and steal a spare...

[maxout]

...What, you'd do that?

[eudaimonikos]

If I thought I wouldn't die doing it, yeah. It'd be hysterical. Make my old boss look even worse than he must've after the last time I got outta there.

[Well, he's...approaching altruism]

[maxout]

Sounds like it'd be a real petty and spiteful move. [...] I like that.

[of course he does]

...Can you even really die?

[eudaimonikos]

Technically, no. The closest thing we can come is something called retirement. Basically, my essence would be scooped out of this body with a flaming ladle, I'd be broken down into individual atoms, and each of those atoms would be placed on the surface of a different sun. Forever.

[...]

Also, the atoms are each capable of individual psychic screams. You can hear all the retired demons if you enter the wrong plane of existence, they're still at it.

1/2

[maxout]

2/2

[maxout]

[softly, but with great feeling:] What the fuck.

[eudaimonikos]

Yeah, so I'd like to avoid that.